{"id":7512,"date":"2023-09-19T08:13:15","date_gmt":"2023-09-19T01:13:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/?p=7512"},"modified":"2023-09-19T08:13:15","modified_gmt":"2023-09-19T01:13:15","slug":"4-signs-of-secure-attachment-and-why-it-matters","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/?p=7512","title":{"rendered":"4 Signs of Secure Attachment\u2014And Why It Matters"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-3711241968723425\"\r\n     crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div>\n<div class=\"drop-cap text-big text-gray\"> <span class=\"drop-cap__first text-dropcap \">T<\/span>he popular discourse around <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/adult-attachment-styles\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/adult-attachment-styles\/\">attachment styles<\/a> might have you think most people have <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/insecure-attachment\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/insecure-attachment\/\">one of the <em>insecure<\/em> types<\/a>\u2014either an anxious or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/sex-tips-avoidant-attachment\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/sex-tips-avoidant-attachment\/\">avoidant attachment style<\/a>. Perhaps the folks who fall in these camps are just more inclined to bring attention to their attachment style, whether by reposting memes or otherwise commiserating publicly about the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/anxious-avoidant-dating-trap\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/anxious-avoidant-dating-trap\/\">perils of dating<\/a> and relationships. In reality, however, research suggests the healthier <a href=\"https:\/\/psycnet.apa.org\/record\/1997-43182-015\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/psycnet.apa.org\/record\/1997-43182-015\">secure attachment style is the most common<\/a>.<\/div>\n<p>Though people who tend to form secure and stable attachments may not feel like the dynamics of their relationships are interesting or worthy of discussion, we can all stand to learn from them. Indeed, being able to spot the signs of a secure attachment style can help you identify your own relational strengths or pinpoint where you might have room for growth.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe all know these people [with secure attachment], and oftentimes it&#8217;s like they&#8217;ve been touched by magic,\u201d says psychiatrist and neuroscientist, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.columbiapsychiatry.org\/profile\/amir-levine-md\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.columbiapsychiatry.org\/profile\/amir-levine-md\">Amir Levine, MD<\/a>, associate professor of clinical psychiatry at Columbia University and co-author of <a href=\"https:\/\/clicks.trx-hub.com\/xid\/leafgroup_ca5e0_wellgood?q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FAttached-Science-Adult-Attachment-YouFind%2Fdp%2F1585429139%3Ftag%3Dwgtrx9310-20%26asc_refurl%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Fwww.wellandgood.com%252Fsigns-secure-attachment%252F%26asc_source%3Ddirect%26asc_campaign%3Dno-campaign&amp;p=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.wellandgood.com%2Fsigns-secure-attachment%2F&amp;event_type=click\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Attached-Science-Adult-Attachment-YouFind\/dp\/1585429139\"><em>Attached<\/em><\/a>. \u201cThings go easily for them at work and in their relationships. The thing is, we often miss them because there&#8217;s no drama, and they [rarely] complain about anything.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>But to overlook secure attachment would be a disservice to us all. \u201cResearch shows that those who develop secure attachment styles in childhood are less likely to suffer from a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC3266769\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC3266769\/\">mood disorder<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/31681039\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/31681039\/\">substance-use disorder<\/a>, or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC4341899\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC4341899\/\">stress-related illness<\/a>,\u201d says clinical psychologist and psychotherapist <a href=\"https:\/\/www.choosingtherapy.com\/krista-jordan\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.choosingtherapy.com\/krista-jordan\/\">Krista Jordan, PhD<\/a>. Which is why, it&#8217;s well worth your while to learn the common signs of secure attachment in action\u2014and discover ways that you can move toward a more secure attachment style if these signs don&#8217;t quite resonate with you.<\/p>\n<hr\/>\n<div class=\"experts-in-article noskim py-[24px] px-[40px]\">\n<p>Experts In This Article<\/p>\n<ul class=\"!ml-[18px]\">\n<li> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.columbiapsychiatry.org\/profile\/amir-levine-md\" rel=\"noopener\" target=\"_blank\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.columbiapsychiatry.org\/profile\/amir-levine-md\">Amir Levine, MD<\/a>, psychiatrist, neuroscientist, associate professor of clinical psychiatry at Columbia University Department of Psychiatry, and author of <a href=\"https:\/\/clicks.trx-hub.com\/xid\/leafgroup_ca5e0_wellgood?q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FAttached-Science-Adult-Attachment-YouFind%2Fdp%2F1585429139%3Ftag%3Dwgtrx9310-20%26asc_refurl%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Fwww.wellandgood.com%252Fsigns-secure-attachment%252F%26asc_source%3Ddirect%26asc_campaign%3Dno-campaign&amp;p=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.wellandgood.com%2Fsigns-secure-attachment%2F&amp;event_type=click\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Attached-Science-Adult-Attachment-YouFind\/dp\/1585429139\"><em>Attached, The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find and Keep Love<\/em><\/a> <\/li>\n<li> <a href=\"https:\/\/bayareacbtcenter.com\/dr-avigail-lev\/\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" target=\"_blank\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/bayareacbtcenter.com\/dr-avigail-lev\/\">Avigail Lev, PsyD<\/a>, licensed clinical psychologist, certified mediator, and founder of Bay Area CBT Center <\/li>\n<li> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.choosingtherapy.com\/krista-jordan\/\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" target=\"_blank\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.choosingtherapy.com\/krista-jordan\/\">Krista Jordan, PhD<\/a>, clinical psychologist, psychotherapist, and couples therapist <\/li>\n<li> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.drpatricelegoy.com\/\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" target=\"_blank\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.drpatricelegoy.com\/\">Patrice Le Goy, Phd, LMFT, Phd, LMFT, MBA<\/a>, international psychologist and adjunct professor at the Chicago School of Professional Psychology <\/li>\n<\/ul><\/div>\n<hr\/>\n<h2>What exactly is secure attachment?<\/h2>\n<p>Secure attachment is one type of attachment style, or way that we relate to others and establish intimacy. It comes from attachment theory, which is a basis for understanding how we form relationships <a href=\"https:\/\/psycnet.apa.org\/record\/1993-01038-001\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/psycnet.apa.org\/record\/1993-01038-001\">credited to the joint work<\/a> of British psychiatrist John Bowlby, FRCPsych, and American-Canadian developmental psychologist Mary Ainsworth, PhD.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.attachmentproject.com\/attachment-theory\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.attachmentproject.com\/attachment-theory\/\">Dr. Bowlby initially came up with attachment theory<\/a> to explain how a child reacts when separated from their caregiver. And Dr. Ainsworth later developed what\u2019s referred to as the \u201cstrange situation test\u201d\u2014wherein a caregiver leaves their child alone for a brief period, then returns to the room\u2014as a means for perceiving different kinds of attachment in action.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat moment during the reunion [in the strange situation test] is when [Dr. Ainsworth] identified three attachment styles: anxious, avoidant, and secure,\u201d says Dr. Levine. \u201cIt all had to do with: How effective is the bond in helping the child regulate their emotions? And how quickly do they calm down and then become interested again in the toys around them?\u201d The ability to effectively regulate your emotions in the wake of being detached from a loved one is a keystone of secure attachment.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>\u201cPeople with secure attachment have a larger window of tolerance, meaning their capacity for distress is greater.\u201d \u2014Avigail Lev, PsyD, clinical psychologist<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Put another way, when people have a secure attachment style, \u201ctheir window of tolerance is larger, meaning their capacity for distress is greater,\u201d says clinical psychologist <a href=\"https:\/\/bayareacbtcenter.com\/dr-avigail-lev\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/bayareacbtcenter.com\/dr-avigail-lev\/\">Avigail Lev, PsyD<\/a>, founder and director of <a href=\"https:\/\/bayareacbtcenter.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/bayareacbtcenter.com\/\">Bay Area CBT Center<\/a>. \u201cThe window of tolerance refers to the space in which we can handle stress before becoming overly triggered and too physiologically aroused for our prefrontal cortex [which controls things like problem-solving and decision-making] to function effectively.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Having a large window of tolerance and high capacity for distress is why those with a secure attachment may be more likely to trust a partner or friend, and get vulnerable with them without any concern that they&#8217;ll lose interest (or worse); while those with an anxious attachment style might continue to question whether someone likes them, seeking reassurance before volunteering intimacy, and those with an avoidant attachment style might reject closeness of any sort for fear of abandonment.<\/p>\n<div class=\"related-content \" style=\"\" data-module-init=\"related-content\" data-module-immediate=\"\" v-cloak=\"\">\n<div class=\"related-content__wrapper \" v-cloak=\"\" :class=\"{'is-loaded':isLoaded}\">\n<p> <span class=\"inline pr-6 text-seafoam-dark\">Related Stories<\/span> <\/p>\n<p> <related-content class=\"related-content__links\" parent-article-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/signs-secure-attachment\/\" current-title=\"4 Telltale Signs of a Secure Attachment Style\u2014And Why Having One Can Improve Your Relationships\" current-image=\"Leonardo-Borges-Nun\u0303ez-425x285.jpg\" v-on:parsely-posts-loaded=\"onPostsLoaded\" start-date=\"2023-03-18\" tag=\"div\" inline-template=\"\" url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/signs-secure-attachment\/\" secret=\"w5ztterVB03LGZJLfXS0hf3EvQBuFFIWew9hmVQxthU\" apikey=\"wellandgood.com\" limit=\"3\"> <\/p>\n<div>\n<div class=\"related-content__card mb-[10px] sm:mb-[20px]\" :class=\"{'related-content__card--full':posts.length === 1}\" v-for=\"(post, key) in posts\"> <a v-on:click.prevent=\"trackLinkGA($event, key)\" :href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/signs-secure-attachment\/post.url\" data-url-source=\"related-content\" class=\"related-content__link\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"\"> <\/p>\n<div class=\"related-content__card--image bg-tan\" :style=\"{ backgroundImage: 'url(' + post.image_url + ')' }\"> <img :src=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/signs-secure-attachment\/post.image_url\" :alt=\"post.title\"\/> <\/div>\n<p> <\/a>  <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p> <\/related-content> <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<h2>Where does your attachment style come from?<\/h2>\n<p>Traditionally, it&#8217;s been thought that your attachment style is largely influenced by your early interactions with a caregiver; if you felt supported and loved unconditionally, you may have developed a secure attachment with a large tolerance for distress. Whereas, if you didn&#8217;t feel as if your needs were met or often got mixed signals from a caregiver about whether they were going to be there for you, you may have formed an anxious or avoidant attachment style as a coping mechanism, leading you to have a low tolerance for distress and either cling to a partner (anxious) or reject intimacy (avoidant).<\/p>\n<p>But according to a 2019 article reviewing <a href=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/30609910\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/30609910\/\">recent developments in attachment theory<\/a><em>, <\/em>it may also be possible to have had a supportive caregiver as a child and then become insecurely attachment as an adult, or vice versa. \u201cResearchers agree that even though there&#8217;s a certain attachment style [formed] in childhood, that&#8217;s not necessarily the attachment style that you&#8217;re going to have as an adult,\u201d says Dr. Levine. \u201cThere&#8217;s a chance that even if you&#8217;re secure as a child, you may not be secure in your relationships as an adult.\u201d<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>\u201cMore and more, people see [attachment as] less categorical and more on a spectrum.\u201d \u2014Amir Levine, MD, neuroscientist and psychiatrist<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>And you may not fit squarely into one box, either. \u201cMore and more, people see [attachment as] less categorical and more on a spectrum,\u201d says Dr. Levine. \u201cEven though we do have one style that is easier for us to revert to in certain relationships, we can also exhibit behaviors that are consistent with other [styles] in other situations.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>For example, it\u2019s possible to have one type of attachment style in relation to a love interest and another in relation to a friend, given the different ways in which you&#8217;ve experienced romantic relationships and platonic friendships throughout life. \u201cThere&#8217;s the anxious domain and the avoidant domain, and you can fall anywhere along those domains in different relationships,\u201d says Dr. Levine.<\/p>\n<h2>4 key signs of a secure attachment style<\/h2>\n<h3>1. Being a pro at problem-solving<\/h3>\n<p>If your colleagues or friends often turn to you for guidance during a crisis, that\u2019s one of the clearest signs that you may have a secure attachment style.<\/p>\n<p>People with a secure attachment style are \u201cadept at resolving conflicts,\u201d says Dr. Lev. \u201cThey can tolerate the uncertainty of unresolved issues and self-soothe back into a regulated state, which allows them to engage their prefrontal cortex to effectively problem-solve and find solutions.\u201d<\/p>\n<h3>2. Being comfortable getting vulnerable with a partner<\/h3>\n<p>People with a secure attachment style maintain a good balance between depending on a partner and being independent, which puts them at ease with intimacy, says Dr. Lev. \u201cThey can empathize with a partner&#8217;s difficult emotions and thoughts without feeling the urge to flee or distance themselves,\u201d she says. (And they can also share their <em>own<\/em> innermost feelings without the constant concern that their partner will use this intel against them or turn around and betray them.)<\/p>\n<h3>3. Forming and communicating clear boundaries<\/h3>\n<p>\u201cOne of the key signs that someone has a secure attachment style is when they have very clear, defined boundaries that they are able to express to others in a respectful, calm manner,\u201d says psychologist and therapist <a href=\"https:\/\/www.drpatricelegoy.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.drpatricelegoy.com\/\">Patrice Le Goy, PhD, LMFT<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>This is because they can trust that whoever is on the other end\u2014a partner, a friend, a co-worker\u2014will not abandon or disregard them for having such boundaries and upholding them. \u201cFor example, this is someone who can say to their partner, \u2018I didn\u2019t like the way that conversation went, and I would like us to work on the way we talk to each other,\u2019\u201d says Dr. Le Goy.\u00a0 Whereas, someone with one of the insecure attachment styles may be more likely to blame the other person, lose their temper, or speak in absolutes (using words like \u201calways\u201d or \u201cnever\u201d), she says.<\/p>\n<h3>4. Handling critique and criticism well<\/h3>\n<p>People who form secure attachments are able to listen to and integrate feedback from others without concluding that the person offering the feedback views them as a failure or terrible person, says Dr. Le Goy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201c[People with secure attachments] will not assume that someone expressing disappointment or displeasure with them means that they are severing the relationship and don\u2019t want anything to do with them,\u201d she says. They know that no matter the current circumstance, they\u2019re a valuable, important person within the relationship at stake and beyond, she says.<\/p>\n<h2>How can you develop a secure attachment style as an adult?<\/h2>\n<p>If you think you could benefit from better dynamics in your relationships\u2014and the above signs of secure attachment don&#8217;t quite sound like you\u2014know that you can move <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/different-attachment-styles\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/different-attachment-styles\/\">toward a more secure attachment style<\/a> as an adult.<\/p>\n<p>Even better news: You\u2019ve already taken the first step. Research suggests \u201cthat just knowing about the different attachment styles and understanding secure attachment helps people become more secure,\u201d says Dr. Levine. \u201c&#8230;If you don&#8217;t know about this framework, then you don&#8217;t really have a blueprint.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Another step in the secure direction is to make the securely attached folks in your life a part of your inner circle, says Dr. Levine. \u201cWe tend to gravitate to where there&#8217;s drama and people don&#8217;t call us back or people are not being secure with us,\u201d he says. \u201cSo, people who have insecure [attachment styles] can gravitate toward more insecure interactions.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>But this just reinforces an insecure cycle, as we tend to <a href=\"https:\/\/theconversation.com\/ill-have-what-shes-having-how-and-why-we-copy-the-choices-of-others-122682\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/theconversation.com\/ill-have-what-shes-having-how-and-why-we-copy-the-choices-of-others-122682\">mirror the behaviors of those around us<\/a> back to them. Instead, Dr. Levine suggests consciously &#8220;giving primacy to people who are secure in your life, so you create for yourself a more secure base.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>A mental health professional can provide you with additional tools and strategies along the way. \u201cIt is possible to change your attachment style and move toward secure attachment, but it requires a commitment to exploring your childhood experiences, acknowledging how they have shaped you, and then creating very clear boundaries and focusing on developing safe and supportive relationships,\u201d says Dr. Le Goy. \u201cMost people can benefit from doing this work with a mental health professional who can help them through this process.\u201d You may have less drama to recount over brunch, but the benefits are worth it.<\/p>\n<div class=\"post-citations mt-[40px] mb-[30px]\" data-module-init=\"main-2020\/post-citations\" data-module-immediate=\"true\">\n<hr class=\"!border-seafoam-dark mb-[24px]\"\/>\n<div class=\"post-citations-content flex flex-col gap-[24px]\">\n<p>Well+Good articles reference scientific, reliable, recent, robust studies to back up the information we share. You can trust us along your wellness journey.<\/p>\n<div>\n<ol class=\"!ml-[18px] !mt-0\">\n<li>\n              Mickelson, K. D., Kessler, R. C., &amp; Shaver, P. R. (1997). Adult attachment in a nationally representative sample.\u00a0<em>Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 73<\/em>(5), 1092\u20131106. doi:10.1037\/0022-3514.73.5.1092            <\/li>\n<li>\n              Mikulincer, Mario, and Philip R Shaver. \u201cAn attachment perspective on psychopathology.\u201d\u00a0<i>World psychiatry : official journal of the World Psychiatric Association (WPA)<\/i>\u00a0vol. 11,1 (2012): 11-5. doi:10.1016\/j.wpsyc.2012.01.003            <\/li>\n<li>\n              Schindler, Andreas. \u201cAttachment and Substance Use Disorders-Theoretical Models, Empirical Evidence, and Implications for Treatment.\u201d\u00a0<i>Frontiers in psychiatry<\/i>\u00a0vol. 10 727. 15 Oct. 2019, doi:10.3389\/fpsyt.2019.00727            <\/li>\n<li>\n              Pietromonaco, Paula R, and Sally I Powers. \u201cAttachment and Health-Related Physiological Stress Processes.\u201d\u00a0<i>Current opinion in psychology<\/i>\u00a0vol. 1 (2015): 34-39. doi:10.1016\/j.copsyc.2014.12.001            <\/li>\n<li>\n              Bretherton, I. (1992). The origins of attachment theory: John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth.\u00a0<em>Developmental Psychology, 28<\/em>(5), 759\u2013775. doi:10.1037\/0012-1649.28.5.759            <\/li>\n<li>\n              Fraley, R Chris. \u201cAttachment in Adulthood: Recent Developments, Emerging Debates, and Future Directions.\u201d\u00a0<i>Annual review of psychology<\/i>\u00a0vol. 70 (2019): 401-422. doi:10.1146\/annurev-psych-010418-102813            <\/li>\n<\/ol><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<hr class=\"!border-seafoam-dark mt-[24px]\"\/>\n  <\/div>\n<div class=\"disclaimers__after_content mb-[18px] mt-[16px] pt-[16px]\">\n<div class=\"outline-earmark relative mt-[8px] pt-[10px] pl-[20px]\">\n<p>\n            Our editors independently select these products. Making a purchase through our links may earn Well+Good a commission.          <\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div data-type=\"_mgwidget\" data-widget-id=\"1675549\">\r\n<\/div>\r\n<script>(function(w,q){w[q]=w[q]||[];w[q].push([\"_mgc.load\"])})(window,\"_mgq\");\r\n<\/script>\r\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The popular discourse around attachment styles might have you think most people have one of the insecure types\u2014either an anxious or avoidant attachment style. Perhaps the folks who fall in these camps are just more inclined to bring attention to their attachment style, whether by reposting memes or otherwise commiserating publicly about the perils of &hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":7513,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7512","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7512","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7512"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7512\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/7513"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7512"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7512"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7512"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}