{"id":4259,"date":"2023-05-29T01:31:19","date_gmt":"2023-05-28T18:31:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/i-no-longer-want-to-be-the-fit-friend\/"},"modified":"2023-05-29T01:31:19","modified_gmt":"2023-05-28T18:31:19","slug":"i-no-longer-want-to-be-the-fit-friend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/?p=4259","title":{"rendered":"I No Longer Want To Be the &#8216;Fit&#8217; Friend"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-3711241968723425\"\r\n     crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div>\n<p> <span class=\"drop-cap__first text-dropcap \">&amp;<\/span>ldquo;Wow! You\u2019re really going to eat a piece of cake?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This was a real sentence uttered to me a few years ago while I was in college. I was in a room full of friends celebrating someone\u2019s birthday (my roommate\u2019s I think) and everyone was chowing down on ice cream cake. Standing in a group with a few of my close friends, one of them said these words to me as I served myself a piece of cake. I imagine her thought was something in the realm of: \u201cIsabel, the \u2018healthy\u2019 friend who never eats \u2018junk food\u2019 is going to eat cake??? This can\u2019t be.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>At that time, I was really struggling in my relationship with food and movement. I restricted food and had an unhealthy, rigid exercise routine. Healing my relationship with food took time, effort, and a willingness to go against societal norms. But it was oh so worth it.<\/p>\n<h2>Health is a personal journey<\/h2>\n<p>Some people view health as the freedom to do what they want in life without physical or mental ailments getting in their way. Some people view it as being free from disease so they can be there for their family for as long as possible. Some people view it as feeling amazing in their bodies and having a positive relationship with food. With <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/wellness-trap\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/wellness-trap\/\">diet culture\u2019s pervasiveness<\/a>, many people view it as being thin. Regardless, the concept of health is not the same for everyone.<\/p>\n<div class=\"related-content \" style=\"\" data-module-init=\"related-content\" data-module-immediate=\"\" v-cloak=\"\">\n<div class=\"related-content__wrapper \" v-cloak=\"\" :class=\"{'is-loaded':isLoaded}\">\n<p> <span class=\"inline pr-6 text-seafoam-dark\">Related Stories<\/span> <\/p>\n<p> <related-content class=\"related-content__links\" parent-article-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/fit-friend-identity-trap\/\" current-title=\"How Letting Go of My Identity as the \u2018Fit\u2019 Friend Allowed My Relationship With Food and Movement To Blossom\" current-image=\"GettyImages-1289411784-425x285.jpg\" v-on:parsely-posts-loaded=\"onPostsLoaded\" start-date=\"2022-11-28\" tag=\"div\" inline-template=\"\" url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/fit-friend-identity-trap\/\" secret=\"w5ztterVB03LGZJLfXS0hf3EvQBuFFIWew9hmVQxthU\" apikey=\"wellandgood.com\" limit=\"3\"> <\/p>\n<div>\n<div class=\"related-content__card mb-[10px] sm:mb-[20px]\" :class=\"{'related-content__card--full':posts.length === 1}\" v-for=\"(post, key) in posts\"> <a v-on:click.prevent=\"trackLinkGA($event, key)\" :href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/fit-friend-identity-trap\/post.url\" data-url-source=\"related-content\" class=\"related-content__link\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"\"> <\/p>\n<div class=\"related-content__card--image bg-tan\" :style=\"{ backgroundImage: 'url(' + post.image_url + ')' }\"> <img :src=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/fit-friend-identity-trap\/post.image_url\" :alt=\"post.title\"\/> <\/div>\n<p> <\/a>  <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p> <\/related-content> <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p>I grew up feeling like my thighs were too big and like I didn\u2019t have muscles as defined as my soccer teammates. I didn\u2019t face <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/is-body-mass-index-accurate\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/is-body-mass-index-accurate\/\">weight stigma<\/a>\u2014weight-based discrimination that <a href=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/29171076\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/29171076\/\">research shows produces real harms<\/a> on psychological and physiological health\u2014in the way that too many kids and teens do from doctors, friends, family, and more. But I did feel like my body wasn\u2019t good enough, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/can-you-be-overweight-and-healthy\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/can-you-be-overweight-and-healthy\/\">like I wasn\u2019t good enough<\/a>. Like so many other college students, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/freshman-15\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/freshman-15\/\">I feared the so-called \u201cfreshman 15.&#8221;<\/a><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>My mind (unlike my food) was fried.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Before long, I found myself in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/eating-disorder-harm-reduction\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/eating-disorder-harm-reduction\/\">the throes of an eating disorder<\/a>. The journey getting there was fraught with family dysfunction, loss, and feelings of inadequacy. My eating disorder, including the restrictive eating and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/what-to-know-about-exercise-addiction\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/what-to-know-about-exercise-addiction\/\">obsessive exercise<\/a> that came with it, became intimately tied to my identity. I became known as the \u201chealthy\u201d or \u201cfit\u201d friend despite struggling greatly in my relationship with food, my body, and exercise.<\/p>\n<p>Before long, I knew something was wrong. I was tired of waking up every morning worrying about how I would continue following the arbitrary food and exercise rules my eating disorder created. My mind (unlike my food) was fried.<\/p>\n<h2>My road to recovery<\/h2>\n<p>If you\u2019ve been through <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/eating-disorder-resources\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/eating-disorder-resources\/\">treatment for an eating disorder <\/a>or worked to overcome disordered eating, you know that relinquishing control and achieving a healthy relationship with food and your body is not easy. It takes an incredible amount of work. You have to be vulnerable and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/what-is-shadow-work\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/what-is-shadow-work\/\">confront parts of yourself you kept hidden or suppressed<\/a>\u2014consciously or subconsciously.<\/p>\n<p>I was confronted with a dilemma: I realized that my identity had become so wrapped up in these truly disordered behaviors\u2014not to mention that I was a dietetics student, so my identity felt even more tied to nutrition. Yet to reach recovery, I had to shed this identity.<\/p>\n<h3>You are not just one thing<\/h3>\n<p>The dietitian I worked with in eating disorder treatment said something to me that has stuck with me to this day. It was something along the lines of: \u201cJust because you\u2019re studying nutrition, doesn\u2019t mean your whole identity has to be nutrition.\u201d It seems so obvious now, but it blew my mind. And it can apply to so many people.<\/p>\n<p>I can imagine the power of some people hearing the words\u2026<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cJust because you\u2019re a runner, doesn\u2019t mean your value lies solely in your ability to run far or fast.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cJust because you like eating veggies, doesn\u2019t mean you can\u2019t enjoy cake or cookies too.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>\u201cJust because you\u2019re an athlete, doesn\u2019t mean your worth diminishes if you have to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/getting-back-into-running-after-an-injury\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/getting-back-into-running-after-an-injury\/\">take time away from your sport because of an injury<\/a>.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>In declaring such a huge part of my identity to be my (disordered) eating and exercise behaviors, I was dismissing all the other parts of myself that shape who I am. I was suppressing my Latinidad by trying to conform to the Eurocentric beauty ideal and avoiding my cultural foods. I wasn\u2019t granting myself space to feel pleasure through enjoying food and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/types-of-rest\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/types-of-rest\/\">basking in rest<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Furthermore, I neglected to see how my obsessive exercise and restrictive eating behaviors harmed my relationships. I didn\u2019t let myself go for hikes and discover my love of nature because they weren\u2019t easily quantifiable like my running and weight lifting routine. I didn\u2019t let myself explore so many other parts of who I am today because of my obsession with maintaining an identity as the \u201chealthy\u201d or \u201cfit\u201d friend.<\/p>\n<p>Oftentimes, we find ourselves with externally-imposed identities that we didn\u2019t really choose for ourselves. I didn\u2019t set out to be the \u201chealthy\u201d or \u201cfit\u201d friend, but that title ended up being a big part of my identity. Letting go of that was key to my recovery, even with the discomfort of pushing back. Recovery for me has meant shedding certain identities to make room for more authentic parts of myself to shine through, regardless of the way it\u2019s changed how others view me. I know that I\u2019m allowed to grow and evolve and I don\u2019t need to justify my choices to others. Hence, the cake incident\u2014I know I\u2019m allowed to eat all the cake I want.<\/p>\n<h2>Building a healthy relationship with food and movement<\/h2>\n<p>Today, I still love being physically active, but my relationship with movement has shifted. I even took a few months away from exercise during my <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/community-care-eating-disorder\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/community-care-eating-disorder\/\">eating disorder recovery journey<\/a> so my body could get the rest it needed.<\/p>\n<p>Rather than exercise, which has a rigid connotation for me, I now use <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/workout-plan-intuitive-exercise\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/workout-plan-intuitive-exercise\/\">the term joyful movement<\/a>. It grants me more flexibility to evolve my practice and reminds me that it\u2019s meant to enhance my well-being, not punish my body. I don\u2019t rigidly do the same workout routine everyday. Rather, I let my movement practice evolve depending on my mood and interests. I prioritize rest days as much as movement days. I\u2019ve tried Zumba, hiking, biking, yoga, barre, and more. I remain open to letting my practice evolve.<\/p>\n<p>When it comes to food, I not only practice intuitive eating myself, but as a dietitian, I help my clients <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/intuitive-eating-tips\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/intuitive-eating-tips\/\">embrace intuitive eating<\/a>\u2014a non-diet approach to nutrition that prioritizes using internal cues rather than external rules and restrictions to guide eating. It embraces the value of all foods from cake to veggies to rice and more.<\/p>\n<p>I am conscious of my intention behind my movement and eating behaviors. Is it coming from a place of wanting external validation or from a place of wanting to have fun and feel good in my body? I try not to let other people\u2019s judgements get in the way of my recovery.<\/p>\n<p>I am conscious of honoring my body\u2019s cues and making sure to eat enough. I often find myself eating more than the people I\u2019m dining with, and that\u2019s okay with me. I know how important eating enough is to my well-being. I know that eating enough and eating foods society looks down upon does not make me lesser than. And I don\u2019t have to explain that to anyone for it to be my truth.<\/p>\n<h2>Final thoughts<\/h2>\n<p>Health and wellness is such a personal journey. We each have different priorities and struggles that influence our decisions and behaviors. My journey showed me that to be most authentic to ourselves, we often have to tune out other people\u2019s opinions of our eating and exercise choices to allow space to tune into what is best for <em>our<\/em> overall well-being.<\/p>\n<p>By doing so, I&#8217;ve shed my identity of being the \u201chealthy\u201d and \u201cfit\u201d friend. Because I am so much more than that.<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div data-type=\"_mgwidget\" data-widget-id=\"1675549\">\r\n<\/div>\r\n<script>(function(w,q){w[q]=w[q]||[];w[q].push([\"_mgc.load\"])})(window,\"_mgq\");\r\n<\/script>\r\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&amp;ldquo;Wow! You\u2019re really going to eat a piece of cake?\u201d This was a real sentence uttered to me a few years ago while I was in college. I was in a room full of friends celebrating someone\u2019s birthday (my roommate\u2019s I think) and everyone was chowing down on ice cream cake. Standing in a group &hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":4260,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4259","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO 4.9.8 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"\u201cWow! You\u2019re really going to eat a piece of cake?\u201d This was a real sentence uttered to me a few years ago while I was in college. I was in a room full of friends celebrating someone\u2019s birthday (my roommate\u2019s I think) and everyone was chowing down on ice cream cake. 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