{"id":4103,"date":"2023-05-24T07:35:07","date_gmt":"2023-05-24T00:35:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/feeling-energized-or-tired-after-sex-heres-why\/"},"modified":"2023-05-24T07:35:07","modified_gmt":"2023-05-24T00:35:07","slug":"feeling-energized-or-tired-after-sex-heres-why","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/loudhdtv.com\/?p=4103","title":{"rendered":"Feeling Energized or Tired After Sex? Here&#8217;s Why"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-3711241968723425\"\r\n     crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script><br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div>\n<p> <span class=\"drop-cap__first text-dropcap \">T<\/span>here\u2019s a common caricature of heterosexual monogamous intercourse, wherein after climaxing, the man collapses into pillows on a bed in a blissed-out state of pleasure, ready to drift off to sleep while the woman is wide awake, twiddling her thumbs and staring at the ceiling. Sure, that vignette is rife with generalizations of gender norms and relationship dynamics, but it does still bring about an interesting question: What does it mean if you&#8217;re more energized or tired after sex (regardless of your identity or orientation)?<\/p>\n<p>When you and your partner\u2019s energy levels don\u2019t match following sex, it can affect your relationship in and out of the bedroom. Knowing why you may have more or less energy after sex\u2014and how you can address any concerns or communicate needs better with your partner\u2014is an important way to strengthen the relationship as a whole.<\/p>\n<h2><strong>Hormonal reasons behind those post-sex energy levels<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>The hormones your brain releases during (and immediately after) sex play a role in how energized (or not) you feel after doing the deed. \u201cDuring a sexual encounter, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC8360917\/#:~:text=Most%20of%20the%20studies%20found,the%20oxytocin%20in%20sexual%20desire.\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC8360917\/#:~:text=Most%20of%20the%20studies%20found,the%20oxytocin%20in%20sexual%20desire.\">the brain releases oxytocin<\/a>,\u201d says <a href=\"https:\/\/centerforloveandsex.com\/therapists\/sari-cooper-lcsw-cst\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/centerforloveandsex.com\/therapists\/sari-cooper-lcsw-cst\/\">Sari Cooper, LCSW<\/a>, certified sex therapist and director of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.centerforloveandsex.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.centerforloveandsex.com\">The Center for Love and Sex<\/a> in New York City. Oxytocin, known as the \u201clove hormone,\u201d helps you feel warm and relaxed <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC6442937\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC6442937\/\">by lowering cortisol<\/a> (the \u201cstress hormone\u201d), she says. Thus, from a purely chemical level, getting physical with your partner can help you or your partner relax enough to fall asleep.<\/p>\n<div class=\"related-content \" style=\"\" data-module-init=\"related-content\" data-module-immediate=\"\" v-cloak=\"\">\n<div class=\"related-content__wrapper \" v-cloak=\"\" :class=\"{'is-loaded':isLoaded}\">\n<p> <span class=\"inline pr-6 text-seafoam-dark\">Related Stories<\/span> <\/p>\n<p> <related-content class=\"related-content__links\" parent-article-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/tired-after-sex\/\" current-title=\"Why You May Feel So Tired (or Wired) After Having Sex\u2014And How To Deal\" current-image=\"GettyImages-Prostock-Studio-425x285.jpg\" v-on:parsely-posts-loaded=\"onPostsLoaded\" start-date=\"2022-11-22\" tag=\"div\" inline-template=\"\" url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/tired-after-sex\/\" secret=\"w5ztterVB03LGZJLfXS0hf3EvQBuFFIWew9hmVQxthU\" apikey=\"wellandgood.com\" limit=\"3\"> <\/p>\n<div>\n<div class=\"related-content__card mb-[10px] sm:mb-[20px]\" :class=\"{'related-content__card--full':posts.length === 1}\" v-for=\"(post, key) in posts\"> <a v-on:click.prevent=\"trackLinkGA($event, key)\" :href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/tired-after-sex\/post.url\" data-url-source=\"related-content\" class=\"related-content__link\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"\"> <\/p>\n<div class=\"related-content__card--image bg-tan\" :style=\"{ backgroundImage: 'url(' + post.image_url + ')' }\"> <img :src=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/tired-after-sex\/post.image_url\" :alt=\"post.title\"\/> <\/div>\n<p> <\/a>  <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p> <\/related-content> <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p>That\u2019s just from the sexual \u201cencounter,\u201d though. \u201cIf a person orgasms, there are further hormones that get released, including vasopressin, prolactin, serotonin, nitric oxide, and endorphins,\u201d says Cooper. Vasopressin affects <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC5743651\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC5743651\/\">memories, concentration, and even aggression<\/a>, which is why people often feel bonded to their sexual partners. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/how-to-increase-serotonin\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/how-to-increase-serotonin\/\">Serotonin<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/exercise-induced-arousal\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/exercise-induced-arousal\/\">endorphins<\/a> are hormones that improve your mood. Nitric oxide promotes <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC8109295\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC8109295\/\">additional blood flow to the genitals<\/a>, increasing sensation and supporting orgasm. Most importantly, prolactin is <a href=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/16095799\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/16095799\/\">released after orgasm<\/a> to help decrease desire and help you feel satisfied\u2014again promoting that relaxed state.<\/p>\n<p>Everyone produces prolactin, but <a href=\"https:\/\/www.news-medical.net\/news\/20210104\/Prolactin-triggers-male-refractory-period-indicates-study.aspx\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.news-medical.net\/news\/20210104\/Prolactin-triggers-male-refractory-period-indicates-study.aspx\">a person\u2019s levels vary at different times<\/a> of their life depending on whether or not they have orgasmed, if they are or have been pregnant, or if they are nursing. Since <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC4901097\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC4901097\/\">prolactin levels affect sexual satisfaction<\/a>, which leads to the further release of hormones affecting energy, their effect may rely in some part on the sexual biology of the person having intercourse. It doesn\u2019t help that heterosexual women often experience \u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/why-cant-i-orgasm\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/why-cant-i-orgasm\/\">the orgasm gap<\/a>\u201d which contextualizes the lowered likelihood of a vagina-haver to orgasm during penetrative intercourse than a penis-haver. This would, then, make folks with a vagina less likely than folks with a penis partners to have released the hormones after cis-hetero sex that would make them tired.<\/p>\n<p>Keep in mind that \u201cwe are all unique individuals, so these hormones may have different effects on people no matter what their sex,\u201d says Cooper.<\/p>\n<h2><strong>The other variables at play if you&#8217;re tired after sex<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>How you feel after sex isn\u2019t as simple as chemicals in your brain. There are all kinds of variables that can affect hormone release such as a person\u2019s menstrual cycle, medications, or other factors. Your day-to-day sexual response is also liable to vary, and \u201cthe same person doesn&#8217;t have the same reaction every time,\u201d says <a href=\"https:\/\/www.stellaharris.net\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.stellaharris.net\">Stella Harris<\/a>, an intimacy coach and author of <a href=\"https:\/\/clicks.trx-hub.com\/xid\/leafgroup_ca5e0_wellgood?q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FTongue-Tied-Untangling-Communication-Relationships%2Fdp%2F1627782664%3Ftag%3Dwgtrx10129-20%26asc_refurl%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Fwww.wellandgood.com%252Ftired-after-sex%252F%26asc_source%3Ddirect%26asc_campaign%3Dno-campaign&amp;p=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.wellandgood.com%2Ftired-after-sex%2F&amp;event_type=click\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Tongue-Tied-Untangling-Communication-Relationships\/dp\/1627782664?tag=wellgoodauto-20\"><em>Tongue Tied: Untangling Communication in Sex, Kink, and Relationships<\/em> and <em>The Ultimate Guide to Threesomes<\/em><\/a>. \u201cNot only can the sex be different, but the state we go into it can also affect the way we feel coming out.\u201d That is, if you\u2019re already tired before having sex, odds are that the sex will make you feel more tired.<\/p>\n<p>The physical toll of sex can also impact your post-intimacy energy levels. \u201cSexual activity can be like working out and your stamina is challenged so that when some folks are done, they are ready to sleep and for others, they\u2019re more wired,\u201d says Cooper.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>&#8220;What&#8217;s important is to be accepting of whatever your body needs after sex&#8230;Nothing good comes from fighting against our body&#8217;s needs.&#8221; \u2014Stella Harris, intimacy coach and author<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Your emotional state also affects how alert or depleted you are after sex. For example, \u201cif one person is worried they are engaging sexually as a way of creating a deeper emotional bond, their vulnerability will be higher,&#8221; Cooper says. &#8220;If the emotional connection is not apparent or returned, falling asleep might be a way to cope with their disappointment.&#8221; Or, \u201cif two partners share an aligned experience that makes both of them equally connected and hopeful about their relationship, sleeping can be the result of a super-relaxed state,&#8221; she says. One could also see how either of those scenarios could lead someone to be more awake, either because their head is spinning with anxiety or buzzing with excitement.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat&#8217;s important is to be accepting of whatever your body needs after sex,&#8221; says Harris. &#8220;If you&#8217;re a jump-out-of-bed-and-go-for-a-run person, that&#8217;s great. If you need a cat nap, that&#8217;s great, too. Nothing good comes from fighting against our body&#8217;s needs.&#8221; She says to plan for it as much as possible once you know your patterns. For example, if you know you need to rest after sex, you may want to account for some extra cuddling time before moving on with your day. Or if you know you feel wide awake afterwards, see if your partner is game for morning sex.<\/p>\n<h2>When to be concerned about post-orgasm sleepiness<\/h2>\n<p>It\u2019s normal for your energy level to fluctuate throughout phases of your life, a relationship, or even the week. It\u2019s also normal for people to have patterns they notice about themselves, such as always sleeping through the night after orgasm. However, if you think your reaction to sex or orgasm is extreme\u2014say you&#8217;re so wired you can&#8217;t sleep at all, or unable to stay awake even if you wanted to\u2014the experts say you may want to investigate potential causes with your health-care provider.<\/p>\n<p>A condition called <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/postcoital-dysphoria\/\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/www.wellandgood.com\/postcoital-dysphoria\/\">Post Coital Dysphoria<\/a> (PCD), is what Cooper describes as when someone \u201cmight feel deep sadness after a partnered sexual experience.\u201d People with PCD may have symptoms like mood swings and reduced energy. There&#8217;s also a rare medical disorder called <a href=\"https:\/\/rarediseases.info.nih.gov\/diseases\/10809\/postorgasmic-illness-syndrome\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" referrerpolicy=\"no-referrer-when-downgrade\" data-vars-event=\"body text\" data-vars-click-url=\"https:\/\/rarediseases.info.nih.gov\/diseases\/10809\/postorgasmic-illness-syndrome\">Post Orgasmic Illness Syndrome<\/a> (POIS), which can cause exhaustion, fog, or other flu-like symptoms in people. It can last up to five days post orgasm or sexual encounter. The cause is currently unknown but may be due to either a process in a person\u2019s brain or an allergy to another person\u2019s seminal fluid. If you suspect either of these conditions, speak to your health-care or mental health provider.<\/p>\n<h2><strong>When to talk to your partner about being tired after sex<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Let&#8217;s say you don&#8217;t feel the need to loop in a health-care provider to get to the bottom of why you might feel tired after sex. Even so, it could be worth discussing swings in energy with your partner to make sure they understand how you\u2019re feeling\u2014particularly if they feel differently.<\/p>\n<p>For example, you might bring up if your partner\u2019s energy level is affecting your enjoyment of partnered sex, so \u201cone partner\u2019s falling asleep isn\u2019t misinterpreted as abandonment by the other, and a burst of energy by one partner isn\u2019t misinterpreted as lack of authentic connection,\u201d says Cooper.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s important to talk about what you need in advance so you can advocate for yourself when you\u2019re in a calm, non-sexually charged situation. For example, Harris says one solution would be that the person who tends to have a lot of energy after sex might be able to burn it off ahead of time, leaving them available for calm cuddles with their more sedate partner afterward. Or, the snugglier partner may need to compromise and have a shorter cuddling session after sex to accommodate a partner who needs less time being stationary. Cooper suggests using \u201cI\u201d statements, such as \u201cI feel\u2026\u201d or \u201cI would prefer\u2026,\u201d to avoid assumptions or projecting inaccurate intentions on your partner.<\/p>\n<p>As with most aspects of relationships, communication and compromise are key to finding a solution that works for everyone\u2014and the case of being tired after sex is no exception.<\/p>\n<div class=\"disclaimers__after_content mb-[18px] mt-[16px] pt-[16px]\">\n<div class=\"outline-earmark relative mt-[8px] pt-[10px] pl-[20px]\">\n<p>\n            Our editors independently select these products. Making a purchase through our links may earn Well+Good a commission.          <\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div data-type=\"_mgwidget\" data-widget-id=\"1675549\">\r\n<\/div>\r\n<script>(function(w,q){w[q]=w[q]||[];w[q].push([\"_mgc.load\"])})(window,\"_mgq\");\r\n<\/script>\r\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There\u2019s a common caricature of heterosexual monogamous intercourse, wherein after climaxing, the man collapses into pillows on a bed in a blissed-out state of pleasure, ready to drift off to sleep while the woman is wide awake, twiddling her thumbs and staring at the ceiling. Sure, that vignette is rife with generalizations of gender norms &hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":4104,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4103","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO 4.9.8 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There\u2019s a common caricature of heterosexual monogamous intercourse, wherein after climaxing, the man collapses into pillows on a bed in a blissed-out state of pleasure, ready to drift off to sleep while the woman is wide awake, twiddling her thumbs and staring at the ceiling. 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